Love that is Impossible and Makes No Sense

John 13:31-38

I find it hardest to love purely, those who are closest to me. When I lived with my family, there were many times that I would show my sinful side. It is just that the people who know us, can take us; that is partly true. Love is indeed supposed to be unconditional, but it is not just being unconditional toward me while I am being a jerk; I should not be a jerk and demonstrate love and respect for them. This did not change in my dating relationships, and certainly has not changed in my marriage. Truly loving someone as Christ loves me is hard work; it requires the death of Christ and the death of myself in Christ.

We live in a world that defines love by feeling; it is more of a beneficial goodwill toward cooperative parties. That is why cohabitation is so popular, a long with sex before marriage…we participate in these often pleasurable situations without it costing us anything, especially commitment. When we actually get married and find out that if we are going to stay together for life, that it is going to take more than the warm-mushies and goodwill, then we want out.

Jesus command to us to love one another is the greatest command to a disciple; loving God is pretty much common sense, we mostly claim some sort of loving relationship with God. Yet, we do not realize how much we value the love of God until we start showing it to others. Jesus’ statement, “I am going away, but you cannot follow me,” has two meanings: 1) Jesus was returning to the Father in death, thus it was not time for them to follow and 2) Jesus was about to walk the way of sacrificial, costly love, that without the Holy Spirit, the disciples were not ready to follow. That is why Peter’s statement is so revealing: Peter could not follow in the way of love, much less give up his life because of it…at least not yet. And this kind of love is what demonstrates that we are truly followers of Christ. It is easier to love a world we are trying to win for Christ, it is harder to love people we are stuck with in Christian community.

So what does your love look like? Many of you are being lied to about how well you are loving; you look at your friends and people who like you and think, “I am pretty good at this love thing!” But what about the brothers and sisters in Christ who require a little extra grace, you know, the one’s you can’t stand? Do you treat them like you would treat your best friend when you meet up with them, do you treat them as if they are Jesus? Those friends that you love so much, how much do you REALLY know them? How much do they REALLY know you? My friend Angelique went on a missions/evangelism adventure called the World Race this past year. One of the challenges she faced was constantly being in community and having very little alone time. This drove her crazy at first, mostly because it revealed in her a lack of love and it forced her to deal with people on her team that she did not really like. She misses that community and forced closeness since returning to the States and is trying to create that type of community in Melbourne, FL. Why? Because she understands how community truly teaches us to love and be like Christ; the sad thing is a lot of churches do not provide this and Christians stay perpetually shallow in their love.

What would happen if we decided to love each other unconditionally? First, because God is love in the truest sense, we would need to be connected with God in Christ. We cannot love the way that Jesus loves without the Holy Spirit’s power; Peter needed him and so do we. Second, it would mean a radical shift in how we view relationships. We like to hang around people who are like us and who “make us happy.” However, those relationships are normally shallow and have not encountered the deep waters of human pride, betrayal, and apathy. When we choose to love those who have hurt us the most, we are embracing the kind of love Jesus was talking about. Finally, we need to make it our goal and daily practice to love those who are hard for us to love because many of them are hurting, alone, and desperate. Christ’s love is the answer for all our pain and disappointment, but when we do not show it, it gets lost in the translation. To love in this way is selfless, sacrificial, and suffering…the reward is doing the will of God as he lives in you, and becoming someone entirely different; someone more like Christ.

How do you treat those who dislike your or whom you dislike? Is it like Jesus?

How dependent are you on God’s love to be able to love in this fashion? Could your lack of love for others be your lack of embracing God’s love you?

How can you share with others today the love of God, unpolluted by your own selfish and sinful desires and motives?